Yesterday my daughter and her husband drove a few miles from their house. They waved bye to their kids and their dogs and Marc's mom and dad who are visiting. Then they got checked into their little hospital and Maggie birthed a baby. A beautiful baby girl.  Backing up my story to just before they drove a few miles from their house, Maggie and I were video chatting. She had just woken up from a nap and I mentally noted to myself that she resembled the Maggie that was four or five years old and woken from a nap. That was many moons ago (though it seems like yesterday) But she sat up and felt weird and looked dumfounded. She broke her water, slowly at first and she was confused. Neither of us knew what was happening. Well, yes, we knew she was pregnant and due any day (oh boy that would really be a story if she didn't know) She was asking me if this could indeed be the time, and this is a legitimate question as I am her mother and indeed I have birthed six kids myself. She was asking in the manner that can only be written as COULD THIS BE IT??????? But I really didn't know. The only time I broke my water it happened like POP, like it literally made a very loud noise. Just imagine what that noise would sound like in an exaggerated way and that is definitely what it sounded like, and then a huge waterfall followed. But Maggie had neither the noise or waterfall so I told her to walk a bit and lo and behold just a few steps and yup, she broke her water.  We both laughed and weren't sure how to say bye and good luck and love you, really how do you do that? Especially because a few years ago when her first two children were born I lived 10 miles away and could say see you there.  We now live 3451 miles apart. That is not an exaggeration at all, and when your child is having a baby it seems even farther than that number.  

The picture here is from my walk after Maggie had her baby, I felt so grateful.  It had been a rainy, stormy day (Maggie's favorite) and the sun tried to filter through, it was so pretty. My heart is so full even still. The world is big yes, but also small when your grandchild is born far away and you already love her so much. She is one day old but I already know her deep in my heart. She will have a natural smile and be happy with who she is. She has two older siblings that figured things out for her already so she will have a real vivre la vie type of personality. Which is fitting with her beautiful french name...

Clèmentine Lorraine

 

 School has started. They packed their supplies and climbed aboard the dutch bus.  It felt weird like it's not really time.  I wanted to say haha and let them stay home. But I stood awkwardly and waved with that feeling of laughing or crying, I'm not sure which. Some other random kids also waved back which I thought was a  very sweet thing to do. This is my favorite time of year, mostly because of school supplies.  who doesn't like the thrill of sharpened pencils and white cap erasers? The air is crisp and the start of school kind of makes me feel refreshed.  I miss my kids now that they are physically in a school but I guess  it just feels optimistic? New classes, new friends, new goals. Henry is grade 11 and Sawyer grade 6, their school is an international one, lots of kids from all over the world,  and yes, they are taught in english.

The boys grew this summer and I didn't even notice during any of the summer days, not until they let me take a picture. It is noted now in my brain, the summer they grew up.

Today has been full of storms, the house is so dark.  I cleaned then cut out a few patterns while watching Little House. Mary wanted to get married at age 13, seems so ridiculous to imagine that ever happened.  My great grandmother got married at 16. Her name was Daisy. She was born in 1890 and while I lived with my grandparents Daisy came to live with us.  She was so old to me at age 96.  I was 13 and wish I was mature enough to have asked her about her life. Anyhow, Mary didn't get married in the end (shocking) but was so sad to watch her love chuggity chug away on a train.

Our backyard is rather large considering where we live, it's nice to have greenspace to look out on.  The neighbors have domesticated deer and they frolic and run so fast around. I love watching them.

Abrupt

 After three years I'm pretty rusty, both with blogging and with age. Things are very different from the last time I wrote on here. We sold our house and did a 180 with our lives. Maybe it was the pandemic or maybe it was just life. Anyhow, we moved across the sea back to the Netherlands. It was a difficult decision. Hindsight will only tell us if it was a good one, needless to say the perks are obvious with the youngest two kids attending a school unlike anything they've experienced, the endless history and travel and most importantly: the cheese.  With family coming and going our time together has highlighted the phrase quality time. 

All my words these last few years have been ink to paper. My mind has had an outpouring of thoughts, observations, opinions, frustrations, and now strangely a degree of calmness. These new routines of the last six months are a comfort. They feel nice and the boys seem to be thriving. We were stuck with few options of a change that we were willing to climb aboard with. So we did the extreme. And yes not living near our adult kids and grandkids has been the hardest thing to not let sink my ship, so to speak. It's a physical pain that bubbles up to boiling from a simmer with just a slight trigger of a memory or holiday. (Insert extremely long, exhaling sigh here.)

Today is half over and it's just a regular old day. Boys at school, husband at work, third load of laundry spinning in the world's smallest washing machine. I road my bike in the sprinkling rain to get schnitzel for supper and came back with some flowers to arrange.  I pulled out all my half finished sewing projects and thought I was filled with determination when I glanced at my morning list of things that really can't wait one more day. So I did them and for some reason that inspired me to log in here so I can start writing again about the everyday of this new location and all the trials and rejoices of new language and customs and how my dorkiness knows no borders.