Saturday, July 31, 2010

now ladies, don’t be jealous

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July at our little ranch is when the fruit trees are heavy with fruit, it’s when the wild plums are abundant way out back. The sun is hot, the horse is out to pasture, the kids are riding bikes and asking for popsicles. Sunny and carefree. Right?

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Carefree, unless you have an aversion to spiders. Recently my sweet friend at LMLD remarked that I sound giddy…maybe from the heat and spiders.

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These are two different spiders waiting to greet me as I picked wild plums this morning. I don’t know what kind they are, but if you feel the need to say swear words—it’s okay. I wish you could see how big they are because they are ginormous. My husband did a little girl skippy dance but was able to remain macho at the same time, which was unlike me who did a similar skippy dance accompanied by some words with *#$*^* attached to them while I ran 100 yards away.

I think it is only appropriate to keep sharing. Recently as I was sitting with my son out on the patio I saw something kind of fluffing in the grass nearby. It was this:

hairy

Did I enlarge that enough for you? We have seen many (too) of these this season. I admit the first one I saw I ran over with my car because I was too scared to do anything else. They creep me out but I tell myself they are God’s creatures and they are outside and not harming anyone. That is what I’m supposed to think, right? Isn’t that brave?

I left this one alone only to go out an hour later and find this:

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They were fighting or mating, standing up on two legs. Let me tell you how awesome it was to see this right where I walk from my car each day. Oh boy, it was sooooo cool! I can’t step on them for two reasons….one being they are too big to fit under my shoe and the other being I would faint away. So I left them alone which seemed like the right thing to do. But the next day after killing a recluse in the house—in my bedroom mind you—my spider anxiety took a turn for the worse. That night I couldn’t even put my feet all the way down in the bed for fear of spiders. Everytime I feel a hair on my arm I shriek. I feel like a crazy lady. We have sprayed for spiders twice, in the Spring and Summer.

Do you want me to stop talking about spiders? Am I right? Are you jealous?

How about snakes? Can I talk about them?

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Okay, I won’t. But that’s my husband, isn’t he so manly to hold that snake like that? He’s my hero. You can be jealous of him. He is a hunky, chunky, hunk-o-love.

hunkaburninlove

* this is really just a test to see how often he reads my blog

11 comments:

Jemm said...

I am so glad you did this post. Now our wolf spiders don't seem so bad. Now, we do have the garden spiders (your yellow and black freaky one). Do the tarantulas ever come inside? EEEWWWW!! Does anything else eat them?? I'd just die the first time I saw one. You ARE brave. Cute hubby :)

Elaine said...

heh heh heh! No significant spiders here in the UK. The badgers can be pretty scary though, particularly when I disturb one trying to dig into my chicken run. Our British badgers are two and a half feet long and can weigh up to thirty pounds.

Agree with Jemm on the cute hubby!

Andi said...

Do you realize that those yellow and black spiders are "just an ordinary garden spider" like Charlotte? I mean, don't be knocking their importance! She single-handedly saved Wilbur!

Briana said...

I don't like spiders or any creepies either. I have a son who does and he really likes to show me every catch he makes.

I like your test at the end. You always make me laugh!

Dawn said...

ooo. I hate it when I think I have a hair on my arms and it turns out it was a creepy crawly.... That was a shivery post! Your husband is cute!

LB's Sewing Sanity said...

Note to self...do NOT read Freckled Hen's blog before crawling into bed....ugh!

Jeananne said...

Dear Freckled Hen-
I feel like I've found a long lost friend!!!! I just found your blog and I've been reading all day-I'm all the way back to 2008-and I'm dreading reading the last post. I love how much you treasure your kids and husband-especially when it seems like it's not the "cool" thing to do. I love how you take joy in creating beautiful things for them (and for us to see too). I even love it when you "whine" and show your "real" side-it makes me feel better about all the "real" parts of me. Thank you for a day well spent and the pleasure of reading all the new posts too.

Jeananne said...

Dear Freckled Hen-
I feel like I just found a long lost friend!!!!!! I just discovered your blog today and I can't stop reading! I'm reading all the old posts-I'm back to 2008-and I'm dreading getting to the last/first one-it will feel like hanging up the phone after talking to your best friend. I love how much you treasure your kids and husband-especially in a day when it seems like it isn'g "cool" to do that. I love all the creative beautiful things you make for them. I really love how "real" you are-what you call whining and complaining-it makes me feel not quite so bad about the "real" things I do way too often. Thanks for being my "blog friend"-I can hardly wait for the next new post!!!

Jacqueline said...

Spiders and Snakes and Husbands...oh my! What a bunch of cute guys! I love your blog and your new banner.
Please excuse me, I took on a new job running after 130 retired seniors. They keep me going with their wish list to and fro...theater, boat trips, hikes, swimming, the movies and BYOB hour...can you believe it? All tired out from hanging out with 80 yr olds.
Happy Sunday to you!

Leila said...

Stop!! Just stop!!

I don't mind snakes at all. I'm very impressed with your adorable husband, but not for the snake.

It's those awful spiders.

I just can't take it.

I deal with spiders by calling MY adorable husband or, if not available, sons, or, young daughters, or, in the last resort, by throwing a vacuum cleaner hose at the hateful things.

Yes, I can't stand to have my hand outside a steel rod through which a spider is traveling. I can only throw said rod at it, hoping that it will disappear somehow. They have to be small though.

Will it die in there? I hope so, because I would suffer a thousand tortures if it came out again.

I can't squish them because it's the squishiness that I hate.

I could never run one over with a car. The squishiness would come right up through to me!!

Your spiders are way too big. I can't believe that you can take a picture. The photo will give you cooties right through the lens!

I love all your other posts, though! I'm off to comment on a pretty one.

Robyn said...

Your home seems so serene and lovely. I was going to ask if you can adopt me until I saw this spidey post! Eek!! You are a brave girl! And a funny one and I miss you!